I can't actually bring myself to speak about the neighbours.
When I have summoned up the courage I will tell you what they're like. I have met of them and I have found the other one's profile on Facebook.
I saw the first one on Monday evening while I was pretty zonked and I'm sure he must have thought to himself "hmm... it's like that guy is on drugs and stinks of booze...?!"
Which I was.
So about that. Yeah, I guess I do this because sometimes it allows me to get things off my chest that I wouldn't tell others.
"I felt like shit so I necked a bottle of Jack Daniels and painkillers and spent the day in my pyjamas" is something I just can't bothered to tell people in real life but on here I can.
There really are times when you just have to ask yourself "what would Liza do?"
So today, instead of mooching around at home watching Kath & Kim, Family Guy and old Hitchcock movies I decided to dag around with the pensioners on the Jubilee Line.
No, actually I went to get some culture in Central London.
So I stopped off at the Sainsbury's and had a yoghurt. Da dum.
What I really did though was very cultural because I went to the Royal Academy to go and see some Russian and French impressionist art.
Check out the beautiful Matisse which really is spectacular to look at but the best piece in the whole collection was this one below by Filipp Malyavin...
(Please note the extend and ease with which I am dropping these names, like I have a clue what I'm talking about!)
So it's something like, this painting was a rejection of everything beautiful and complex and artful and was basically just some nihilistic view of society bla bla. It was so profound to look at - just a black square.
It's called Black Square. It's a whole of nothing, just black, square on white. I thought it was brilliant.
And you just stand looking at it and you think what the fuck is this? And it is everything and it is nothing.
So after the excitement of finding some art I want to buy, I was back in the freezing fucking London air so I decided to run home but on the way I found the second most exciting thing today...
If you go to the M&S at Green Park Tube Station there is a miracle of convenience (well, if you're about to be a tourist...)
Inside the shop there is cash machine that doles out American dollars. Isn't that the coolest fucking thing in the world!?
Check it out, I drew $20 from a cash machine in the middle of London.
Fuck knows what I'm going to do with the money but it's new and beautiful.
If this is the most interesting thing I did all day then yes, you don't need to tell me. I need to get more.
After all the culture of Matisse and Cezanne, I reckon the best way to end the day is with Pornotube and a wank.
Tuesday, 18 March 2008
Black square
Written by Bobby Vanquish at around 21:51
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
11 comments:
Haha...you found excitement in a $20 bill?! Well with the US economy going down hill...that $20 won't be worth as much as when you had taken it out...but yah...that's another story!
Sounds like you had fun on your day off! :D
Bry
Nuh, uh, the black painting is my Malevich, I think. He did things that looked like Leger and then went into this DeStile thing.
It's actually cool because it has texture in the black.
I think I saw it in an exhibition in Berlin or Madrid sometime in the last couple of years. Amazing painting.
xoxo
fI: Well I got it for £1 to $1.92 which still makes it pretty good value. What what exactly does $20 buy you?
I was looking at Starbucks - a medium latte in Starbucks in the US is about $3.25. In the UK it's £2.80. Taking the exchange rate into consideration that would make the cost of a Starbucks for you about $4.20! So according to lattenomics - we're okay.
(Is this right?)
Auctor: Hell no! Back up bitch, Black Square is mine. You can have Black Circle.
Anyway - slapping aside. Yeah it is an amazing thing to look at.
Isn't going to museums and galleries and shit fun?
Sometimes I look around at the people there, especially the weird guys in socks and sandals, taking notes of all the paintings and I think to myself "fuck... if I didn't keep myself in check, i would end up like that. fuck."
Fuck.
So...when you met the neighbour, what happened??? Did you drop your shirt? Flirt away? ;-)
I do not wear sandals and socks at the same time ever. Not even in an emergency situation of walking down the driveway to get my newspapers.
Wearing trend-right footwear has not affected my ability to enjoy art.
Note the change I have made to my profile pic. Hee hee. My Malevich.
$20 buys you nearly two and a half times the amount of petrol as in the UK. We pay about $3.50 a US gallon and my conversion puts UK petrol about $8 a gallon assuming a liter costs a quid or so.
I suggest you tuck that twenty away and spend it when visiting Chicago.
How can I send you a photo of my shoes?
Yes. A grande latte will cost you about $4.20.
I am very curious to read what you found out about the neighbors. Details please.
From Matisse & Cezanne to Pornotube...yin & yang...beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
I'll take that $20 if when you get tired of looking at it.
I usually take $200 in 20's dollar bills out of the ATM machine every Friday morning to have spending money for the next week. I hate the new ones as they stick together.
It is a neater bill than the older one. Old Andrew Jackson looks like he got his hair moused and blown dry at an upscale styling salon on this bill.
Oh, yea. Bring him into the 20th century. He's a happenin' dude now.
You need to smell the new bill. It has a nice smell to it when it's new.
Auctor: you can send a picture of your shoes if you like: bobby DOT vanquish AT gmail etc. yeah yeah, nice picture.
Timmy: Yes, I am going to have to get around to telling you about the neighbours... ohmygod... okay, I'll do that in a sec.
Anon: Thanks but I'll think I'll hold onto the $20. The new bill is nice though and it smells all nice and money-ish. i have been keeping it in the pages of the book i'm reading so it's all pressed and beautiful. and the dude on the obverse does have a serious bouffant going on...!
So here are the answers to some questions Carl asked here.
What would $20 buy you in London?
Well, I'm not sure because you can't spend American dollars in London - though if anyone knows where you can, I'd be interested.
But $20 is about the equivalent of £10. For £10 you couldn't buy that much. This is what £10 would buy you in the supermarket:
A pint of Milk, bread, 2l of water, a 4-pack of tinned tuna, a large tub of yoghurt, a large block of cheddar, some chicken breasts and a jar of sauce. £10 doesn't go far.
In the second question, do you mean how much did it cost to buy the $20? The answer to this is nothing - there was no commission on the withdrawal.
And thirdly... what would the equivalent buy in London? Well I've answered that above - but also, the standard price for a newly released CD is about £10. How much is a newly-released CD in the States? That should give you some idea of the parity.
But thanks for asking the questions though. It's fun to answer them. x x
A new CD cost £10?!? That's crazy! The first week a CD comes out here in the US, it costs $10. After that, it might go up to $14.
Post a Comment