Togo or not togo (toga, I mean...)

Thursday, 09.10 edit: Yes, as fleetmonkey pointed out, it's toga not togo. Of course. Duh! I don't know what the fuck a small Pacific Island has to be with anything but now the title makes no sense. Oh well... this is what I wrote before:

Remember on Monday I said that I was sure my housemate had picked up my keys but I didn't want to accuse her of anything?

Housemate to Bobby this morning:
"Ohmygod, I have something to tell you."

Bobby (knowing):
"Hand them over."

Housemate:
"I'm really, really sorry etc."

They were in one of her jacket pockets.

Anyway, we smile and move on and don't hold grudges or anything.

Besides, I'd been wanting to give my bedroom a good tidy-up for sometime and the wrecking I gave it on Monday morning did more good than harm.

You should see it now - it looks like something out of Wallpaper magazine. Everything square, polished and clean.

I would show you pictures but I can't be bothered to get out of the chair to go and take any.

And I'm listening to Pink Floyd which is doing wonders for my mood actually. (Wish You Were Here, since you ask.)

Now - all that aside.

I am having my 30th birthday in five months' time which is already giving me sleepless nights.

Turning 30 is already stressing me out and on top of that, I will be obliged to have a party which is upsetting me even more.

What the fuck does one do for one's 30th?

Since I hate "last minute" I have already been drawing up plans which include one or more of the following...

1/ Flying around the world as a present to myself. That way, I can spend my actual birthday somewhere over the international date line alone. This means having two birthdays, if you going the wrong way around and it also means I will be alone so able to contempt er, contemplate my life. I like this idea - especially because as you turn 30, you're dribbling into your Business Class champagne and catatonic at 30,000 ft.

2/ Holding a huge party in a suite at Claridges and inviting a whole load of fucked up friends, pumping the room full of Cristal, c*** and topless waiters, hoping the whole thing degenerates into a sordid group sex session that the police have to come and break up.

3/ Go to work as normal as pretend that nothing unusual is happening as I turn 30. Ignoring that at least a third of my life has already gone down the tube.

Of course, if it's option 2 then you're all invited. I was thinking that a toga theme would be appropriate to really kick start things (no knickers allowed).

30th birthdays aren't that bad, surely?

Because most of my friends are around my age, I am going to my first 30th of the year on Friday.

As I am not drinking alcohol, I am planning to spend the evening downing lemon cordial. That's suitably bitter.

Speaking of drinking... this weekend I am going to break the moritorium.

It's 23 days since I had anything to drink, the longest since I was around 17 years old. Goddamit I need a boozer so fucken badly.

And when I say I smiled at my housemate when she handed me back my keys, of course I did. But remember this...

Revenge is a dish best served cold.