A spark in the dark

We were trying to get this shot of something that was really difficult. I thought that maybe we needed to fiddle with the lighting; by the way, this was at work yesterday.

I have the camera and two people say "Bobby, I don't think that's very safe" but I shoot back that it is and it will look amazing!

Well, fair point to them really.

I suddenly felt this massive surge of power up my arm. It was like shaking hands with a bolt of lightning. It was the electric shock to end all fucken electric shocks.

It was a kick-ass bone-shaking, teeth ratting electric shock. The one that jangles your eyeballs in their sockets.

Of course everyone starts pissing themselves laughing as I let out this massive fucking yelp.

I don't know what my hand touched (obviously the bit my colleagues warned me not to get close too) but fuck me, it hurt.

Well, it did for a while but then having been laughed at for about 10 minutes and me eventually finding the funny to it, the oddest thing happened.

I felt absolutely fucken amazing. My mood was improved, I felt energised (!) and like I was on Cloud 9. I felt like I'd just necked ten Prozacs and been told I'd won the lottery.

I think Electroshock Therapy is well worth investigating now actually.

Listen, I am not for one minute saying that if you want to be whole and beautiful you should stick your finger into a plughole but er, maybe I am.

No, just kidding.

That's about the most exciting things that's happened in the last few days. I have been sat at home being unexhausted and now I'm bored.

Perhaps I shall venture into Central London to do some shopping though I dunno what to buy?

Oh, that reminds me, I have a birthday party in Clapham tonight (Clapham = about as far south from Central London as the moon is) which I'm kinda half-keen to go to.

In London there's nothing worse than being indecisive and bored. Maybe I should go out be bored and indecisive amongst the hundreds of Saturday shoppers.

Oxford Circus (above), the best place in London to stand around with nothing to do and piss as many people off at the same time.

Using a megaphone to talk about God makes everyone even happier. Always remember, be a winner, not a sinner!