So the harsh reality of the C-word kicks in. No, not Cape Town but Christmas.
As you may know, I am working on Christmas Day. And Boxing Day. And both days after that.
My housemates are packing up and preparing to go to their families for two weeks, until the new year. Friends are heading home to be with loved ones.
I, however, am going to be left all to myself.
Bobby will be waking up on Christmas morning alone in a big house, all on his own (major elicit for sympathy, please...)
Desolate passageways in a large house. During the winter months?
What the fuck could go wrong?
What, indeed.
Do you know - Christmas is only a day. So what if I have no-one to unwrap presents with. So what if all the presents under our little tree are ones to me, from me.
It's not going to be that bad. And besides on Christmas Day evening I will be at work doing fuck-all with other people.
Oh, this is a boring whinge. Anyone else not doing anything or waking up alone on Christmas morning?
If so, then come around to my place and we can spend Christmas eve in the lounge and make tents with the furniture.
We can watch DVDs and eat chocolate. I'll get some little bottles of champagne which we can drink with straws and if we like each other then we can make out in front of the radiator.
Instead of stuffing the turkey let's stuff each other. Innit.
Thursday 20 December 2007
Redrum
Written by Bobby Vanquish at around 22:49
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7 comments:
What time do you want me to come over so we can unwrap each other's packages?
That is exactly what I would rather be doing than spend another completely predictable holiday with the family. If only you had announced it sooner, I would have definitely volunteered!
my sister volunteered to spend christmas with me, otherwise i'd have been by myself, getting drunk in front of a Muppets' Christmas movie!
God, that would be a change, but from now until my mother's death (and maybe quite a bit more) I will have to spend it at my parents.
Steven: And similar other puns that Yule simply love!
Aaron: There's still time. Daily flights from Washington to London. Book it.
Andrea: Please see above comment. Turin - London = quick journey. And bring a sheet. The tent needs a roof. It's going to have to be a big tent.
Oliver: You can come too. Infact it's expected that you show.
ahem, my ex (who I still love, I think) just told me he wants to spend xmas with me. o_0 No Muppets and no tent then... If I was you I'd wait for a little Christmas miracle! There's still time..
Andrea: Well - the thing is that I am actually quite enjoying being on my own. I have the curtains shut and the DVD on constantly.
Come to think of it - any fucker who disturbs me now will get a mouthful! (Of rude-speak, not willy)
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