A pack of carbs

I drink protein shakes and eat sushi. And there's fruit and snacks are tins of tuna and the occasional rice cake (which smells like shit, really...).

Sometimes I have some grilled chicken or those silly Tesco baton carrot thingys. A snack may be a small tub of Greek yoghurt with honey.

But fuck me I want carbs so fucken badly.

I was walking home from the Tube station past the Pizza Express and there were people eating pizzas. I wanted to go in and snatch them off the diners' plates.

I want a pasta and a beer. And spaghetti. And a nice big fat slice of bread with Nutella. And beer.

And more pasta and a pizza and a huge French baguette with some Camembert cheese and red wine.

Oh God, give me carbs.

If you bring me carbs we can lie in bed together and eat them. Red wine and cheese. And French baguette and pasta.

I am going to dream of them tonight I know it.

This picture distresses me about as much as something showing animal abuse or a naked woman.

Just one little carb food thing. Just a little slice. Or a string of spaghetti. Give it to me. Help.